Things That Make Me Wanna Blow My Brains Out

Merry Christmas!!! My gift to you? A 310lb ball of pissed off man with Monster Absolute Zero and Ephedrine coursing through his veins and Blue Heat as his cologne.

Thought #1
I saw this ad today for PETA, which apparently stands for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. I like to think of it as People Eating Tasty Animals. With that in mind let me pose this question, "If we are not supposed to eat animals, then why are they made of delicious meat?" Back on track. This ad has a troll by the name of Alicia Mayer on it donning nothing but lettuce leaves to cover her (wore than likely well worn out) "lady areas". She doesn't want you to eat meat. Awwww, isn't that sweet, she doesn't want evil, dirty, bad for you meat in her body. Once you look at the ad this woman has some of the most ridiculously augmented breasts I've seen in a while. Meat is bad for you? How about those hot air balloons you have sitting on top of your chest? You sure that those are the healthiest thing for you?

Now, I'm not against breast augmentation or any other plastic surgery, but this shit is ludicrous. In fact, when done correctly I think it is a good thing. Not eating meat for ethical reasons just blows my mind. I paid my way through college as a Butcher and a Meat Cutter, not to mention I consume critters as often as possible. These PETA people have serious mental problems.

Thought #2
If you are going to Squat, then Squat. I don't want to see another 6" deep squat ever again. I watched these guys do squats the other day and it made me cringe. they have like 585 on the bar, they walk it out and they have a spotter behind the guy and on each end of the bar, so far so good. Then the back spotter places his knee between the legs of the squatter to gauge how deep the squatter should go. Unless your back spotter is a member of the sideshow of a 3rd rate carnival there is no way he is short enough so that his thigh is at sufficient depth. They then bust out like 10 reps letting the bar bounce on their back at the top of each rep.

To make it even better one of their buddies comes over with his cell phone and takes video. The guy un-racks the bar and and starts the "Squats", while the cameraman is yelling out, "Dis shit goin' on YouTube". Well I hope it does so that they can get ripped a new one in the comments section.

If your too scared to hit depth on a Squat sack up like a real man and do Deadlifts. Deadlifts are the last test of true strength and there is no cheating. Either you pick the bar off of the floor and lock it out, or you don't. It doesn't matter if you hitch or get a slow clean pull as long as it is legal in the organization in which you are lifting. It is that simple. Which leads me to...

Thought #3
Why does no one Deadlift anymore? Nothing gives you the physiological response like a heavy Deadlift. I put on a bunch of mass in the past few months without gaining much fat. You know how I did it? Deep Squats and Deads. It is really that simple. Grab the bar and yank it off of the floor and watch the gobs of muscle build on your frame. Get off the damned machines stop trying to use Ronnie Coleman's 2002 split for the Olympia title.


Until next time RANT OVER!!!

My Gains since August

Last time I did measurements was in the summer and here is my progress.

Then(Aug 4th):
weight: 285
Calves at 19.25"
Biceps: R-19.5/L-18.5
Chest 51"
Butt 51"
Forearm: 15"
Thigh: R-30" L-29"
Neck: 18.5"


Now:
Weight: 310 (bodyfat only up .5%)
Calves: 19.5"
Biceps: R-19.75"/L-19"
Chest 54" (3" gain holy shit)
Butt: 52.5"
Neck: 18.75"
Thigh: 32.5"
Forearm: 15.5"

Not bad. I like good, solid, steady gains. I'm really impressed with my chest measurement, but I guess that is what hapens when you actually train your upper body.


Yesterday was an accessory day, so I just did:

Power Jerks
up to 225x3

Single Arm Power Snatch
worked up to 130x3

Finished with tris and hypers

Learning Lessons the Hard Way and My Body Hating Me

It is officially day 3 of my deload week and I still feel like shit. I'm sore, I don't feel like eating and no matter matter how much sleep I get, I'm exhausted. Last night I felt like eating, but this was after going through the entire day of drinking nothing but water and an energy drink. So today I'm going to do some SMR and call it a day. If you have never used a Yamuna Ball for SMR you should. Just have someone run you through how to use it and it works better than a foam roll most of the time.

I am going to have to start putting deload weeks into my programming. This is the lesson I'm learning the hard way. It used to be that I'd only deload when I felt problems coming on, but this time I got hit with it out of nowhere. This past year has been a roller coaster with big highs and equally deep lows, but if I'm gonna push my body this way I have to suck it up and get it done.

Since it has been officially one year since I was able to start lifting heavy here is the progress

Squat: 225=>500 +275
Deadlift: 315=>505 +190
Power Press: 185=>275 +90 (without actually putting Power Presses in the programming)
Power Clean: 225=>285 +60 (without actually putting Power Cleans in the programming)
Power Snatch (insert joke here): ?=>225
Single Arm Snatch: 90=> 130x3

Not too shabby for one year and the back of a 100 year old woman

Off Day and Things That Piss Me Off

I took the day off to do some filming for some exercise demonstration stuff we are trying to put together for the new trainers. I've gone over the Squat, Deadlift, Turkish Get-Up and many of their variations. Yesterday I was filming on how to utilize chains in training. Most CPTs here at the gym just drape a chain over the barbell and call it a day, without worrying about lockout height and ROM. So I was showing how to double and quadruple the chains and use a smaller gauge chain to adjust for the height.
I get through the Squat and Deadlift and move on to the Bench Press. As I'm in the middle of placing the chain on the collar some asshat walks in front of the camera and proceeds to stand there and watch. He says to me, "I want to watch what you are doing". That is all fine and dandy, but you just wasted film time. So, I had to throw on my professional face and say, "I'm sorry sir, but we are trying to film here."
Its just like the idiots that walk in front of cameras as someone is trying to take a family photo. Take others into consideration from time to time. I don't know about you, but I try to keep pretty aware of my surroundings as I'm walking around. It was pretty obvious that we were filming. There were probably 10 people in the room at the time and one of those people was standing behind a tripod. Call me bat-shit crazy, but I would assume someone is trying to shoot a video in this situation.

Later I'll post training for today. Going to work up to a 1RM on Power Press to see how my upper body is progressing.

Trying to be better.

Alright, so my updating skills blow dogs for quarters, but I'm gonna try to keep this thing going. Since last posting I've started adding gear to my lifting. No, that doesn't mean the prick in the leg type gear, but protective gear. I added a Spud Inc. Belt and a pair of Inzer knee wraps into my training. So far I've managed a 500lb squat and a 505 deadlift. As far as other training goes my right shoulder is so jacked up that I've switched over to a Rippetoe style of training to SLOWLY build the strength there. Started at 135 and I'll be moving up 2-5lbs each week. Bench feels better, but I've limited myself to dead stop benches 3 inches above my chest to help protect the shoulder

Today's Training:

Sumo Dead:
135x10
225x5
315x3
365x3
405x3
465x3 added belt
495x1

Wanted to go for a PR here, but my right glute is jacked right now

Good Mornings
Bar x 15 or so
135x5
225x5
315x5(added belt)
315x5
315x5

Seated Box Jumps From Distance
24" box/16"seat
48"x10
60"x10
72"x10
72"x10

Finished w/ Blast Straps Fallouts and Straight Leg Overhead Situps w/ 70lbs